“In the first year of my grief, there were times when I felt like hiding my personal story of loss and other times when I wanted to wear a sign on my body that read “Be nice to me, I’m grieving,” or “Don’t tick me off; I’ve already got the world on my shoulders,” or maybe even “BEWARE – don’t upset the widow!” I needed a variety of signs that I could switch out depending on my daily mood.” Elizabeth Berrien
Its done. I have been out today on small ventures. Trying to make my way through things. Riding the motorised Pony and almost ramming it into a parked truck. Clunks of despair but nonetheless, continuing. Its a lovely Summertime although the joy has not been great. I breathe it in and sit here under Full Moon. Widowed.
“I’m learning persistence and the closing of doors, the way the seasons come and go as I keep walking on these roads, back and forth, to find myself in new time zones, new arms with new phrases and new goals. And it hurts to become, hurts to find out about the poverty and gaps, the widow and the leavers. It hurts to accept that it hurts and it hurts to learn how easy it is for people to not need other people. Or how easy it is to need other people but that you can never build a home in someone’s arms because they will let go one day and you must build your own.” Charlotte Eriksson
TRULY a day off. Sweet weather after yesterday’s storm and quietness here . My Kids did not disappear into the horror world of addiction. How good is that ?
I am beside the lagoon and I have cameras and the internet has been invented.
I have 4 granddaughters and it has been a very longtime since I have had to live in the horrifying world of active addiction.
Therefore, I now lie down for siesta with a smile.
MiiMii – I have been called today. GRANDMOTHER.
It is a beautiful day.
AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~
THE LAW OF RELAXATION
Another of the great mental laws is The Law of Relaxation. In all mental working effort defeats itself. This is just the opposite of what we find on the physical plane, but it will not surprise us because we know that in many cases the laws of mind are the reverse of the laws of matter.
On the physical plane, the harder you press a drill the faster will it go through a plank. The harder you hammer a nail the sooner does it go into the wall. But any attempt at mental pressure is foredoomed to failure because the moment tension begins, the mind stops working creatively. When you try to force things mentally, when you try to hurry mentally, you simply stop you creative power.
In all mental working be relaxed, gentle, and unhurried for effort defeats itself.
. . . in quietness and in confidence shall be your strength . . . (Isaiah 30:15)