A full day in bed. Collapsed and tormented. Coming to a decision about letting go of my Alfa and buying Curry’s Astra. I WOULD LIKE to cry but tears don’t come . I fee like I am sliding down a greasy pole and losing all the way. Talk about the descending life. Take Izzy out of the structure and the collapse is on.
Now I have been to the Tuesday Urunga AA meeting and I begin to feel spiritually well again. I haven’t felt that way very often over the last year. The meeting was about the Global Comfort of the Fellowship. I have had that via Internet this year but less than usual n my local fellowship. No matter The day is here. I haven’t picked up. I was laughing tonight with People who were warm and beginning to feel like someone waking from a deep nightmare.
Time has eaten me alive, Pulverised me. Living with this disease has pulverised me. Val once said that Wal and I were spiritually tormented and I think she is right.